There is truly nothing like a beautiful and healthy mother-daughter relationship. Mothers have such power to help mold their daughters into kind, confident, and grateful human beings. Likewise, daughters can enrich their mother's lives and add so much beauty to their existence.
It's safe to say that mother-daughter relationships aren't always easy, but we all have the power to build healthy connections that make life so much more fulfilling and beautiful.
The following are some ideas I've gathered over time that I hope you'll benefit from, regardless if you're a mother working to create a close and healthy relationship with your daughter, or if you're seeking to better your relationship with your mom.
#1 - Mothers and Daughters Can Be Best Friends
Healthy mothers and daughters enjoy being together and connecting on deep levels. Just like any relationship, getting there takes trust, loyalty, and spending quality time together.
Besides my husband, my mother is my truest, closest friend. We share everything. We talk every morning over FaceTime while we drink our coffee — sharing our past evenings and what lies ahead of us for that day.
We tell each other our secrets, offer advice, and support and love each other. We check in throughout the day, just as best friends do. Likewise, we enjoy similar experiences, and love each other's company.
If you're wanting to create a closer connection with your mom, or foster a close one with your daughter, it takes opening up, being vulnerable, and engaging in a dialogue that is meaningful.
The more you feed it, the stronger it will become. Also, forgiveness is an important part of the equation. In our families, there are sometimes challenges that we have to overcome. Forging a healthy relationship with our moms and daughters requires that we talk things out and move on to new levels of closeness.
#2 - They Aren't Critical of Each Other
Healthy mother-daughter relationships are full of positivity and love. They don't put each other down or use guilt to manipulate.
As we all know, critical mothers can lead their daughters to a lifetime self-doubt and/or being critical mothers to their own children, friends, and partners. Likewise, overly critical daughters can erode the confidence of their moms as they age.
Sometimes challenges arise because mothers and daughters are polar opposites, but learning to accept the other is everything.
My mother is very confident, assertive, and will speak her mind at any moment. I, on the other hand, can be very sensitive, reserved, and a bit shy. We've made a concerted effort to learn from each other and continually grow our relationship. I soften her a bit, and she strengthens me. We're a perfect duo!
#3 - They Spend Time Together
They make the decision to both bring positivity to the relationship equally and spend quality time together. When they spend time together, they uplift each other, are supportive, and are happy for each other.
My mom and I love spending time together, whether it's taking the babies out to lunch, to their extracurricular activities, to play at the park, shopping, or just watching a good movie together. I've noticed that since having my kids we haven't been able to spend as much time alone, and I've missed that so much. I love that our mother-daughter relationship is ever-evolving.
#4 - They Handle Conflict Properly
They don't cross boundaries when fighting, yet they don't sweep their issues under the rug. As I mentioned above, every mother-daughter relationship has its challenges. And when these moments arise, it's important to calmly talk about them and avoid screaming, fighting, and name-calling.
Respect for the other has to be kept intact, no matter what.
I notice that when my mother and I calmly talk out our misgivings, whether it's in a face-to-face conversation, via texting, or writing a note, we stay so strong and connected. We get through our challenges so much faster and our relationship deepens.
#5 - They Accept Each Other for Who They Are
I love and appreciate how different my mom is from me. I admire and adore her bold and contagious personality. She is so inspiring, unique, and flamboyant. Likewise, she accepts me for who I am and doesn't try to change me into something I'm not.
We are constantly learning from each other and growing as individuals as a result. This dynamic has taught me so much as a mother myself. As I see Kensington grow, I'm trying so hard to foster her individuality, while keeping our forging relationship as close as possible.
In my mind, there are few things more powerful than knowing 100% that the people in your life love you for who you are. This doesn't mean they may not have a few suggestions for bettering ourselves, but my hope is that we can all help foster unconditional acceptance and love into our daily interactions with our moms, children, partners, and friends.
#6 - They are There for Each Other
A healthy mother and daughter relationship is one in which they are able to lean on each other when times get tough. They defend, protect, and support each other through the good and the bad.
I'm so grateful that I can pick up the phone at any moment, knowing that my mom will answer. She will help me through anything. And, she knows I'll be there for her as well. I will do anything to help, protect, and take care of her. That's the magic and beauty of a mother-daughter relationship!
As you navigate through your days as a mother and/or daughter, I hope you'll revel in your bond. We each have one life to live, and I am so thankful each day that I get to strengthen the bond with both my mother and my daughter.
If you've been at odds with your mother or your daughter, thankfully you have today to reconnect and start forging a stronger connection. I think the secret is in your willingness to be vulnerable, real, raw, and forgiving.
For my friends who have lost your moms or daughters, I weep for you. May the love you forged burn bright inside. If you need support, please let the Luvey community know in the comments section below. We are all here to support one another.
Have any tips for strengthening mother-daughter bonds? I'd love to read your thoughts. Please also consider commenting below.